Sunday, February 15, 2015

Possible Titles Of My Autobiography

Pickleback Like Me.
All Filler, No Killer.
How I Learned Not To Google "Massive Bezoar" at 3am.
A Juggernaut Of Misplaced Anxiety.
It's Always Meatballs.
Encouraging Long Walks Off Short Piers Since 1970.
Zero Fucks Given.
A Heartbreaking Work Of Staggering Gardenias.
Call Me Bunndini.
Weird Articles About Ferrets.
I Totally Forgot I Was Stoned.
Like A Sweater That Keeps Knitting And Knitting And Knitting And Knitting And Knitting.
My Story. Not At All Sorry.  
I'm Not Sure How I Feel About Melon.