Nothing Is Sweeter Than Waking Up With A Terrible Hangover And Remembering That I Don't Have Any Children

Sweet Dreams Are a Made Of Cheese Who Am I To Dis This Brie

I travelled the world and the seven seas everybodies carving this pumpkin.

Banana Freak Out

All The Judgement

I have the biggest crankiest pants on today and am in a restaurant frequented by young hip types whilst waiting for a very late friend to show up. Here is a snapshot of the people at the tables around me:

Your name is Bronwen and you are a fat vegan.
Your name is Tyler and your breath smells like corn chips.
Your name is Elias and that beard hides your weak chin.
Your name is Jacob and you eat burritos on crowded buses.
Your name is Sevyn but your real name is Kristen.
Your name is Matt and you wear a big stupid red toque all year round.
Your name is Cam and you only date asian girls.
Your name is Jenni always with an i.
Your name is Geoffrey and you still pee the bed sometimes.
Your name is Courtney and your photography career isn't really panning out how you thought it would.

Shameless Pug

Hey Week Three Of Sickness Please S a Big Fat D

I Took A Fish Head To The Movies

Estaban Was Eaten

ZISSOU SITUATION (verb): A state of undress whereby a male or female is attired in a toque and any number of other clothing and/or underclothing combinations.

Example of use in a sentence: "Who can really blame her for pulling a major zissou in the hot tub the other night. It was only 6 degrees out."

Nuder Than Your Average Bear

YOGI THE BEAR (verb): A state of undress whereby a male or female wears only a neck tie and nothing else. Said ensemble could also include a collar and cuffs but only on very special occasions.  

I Went To Palm Sprangs For Christmas And All I Got Was This Lousy Hot Tub Elbow

The view from my bedroom window in the morning was terrible and two out of three vacationers had the flu.

Most days all we could do was lie in the hot tub drinking all the hot toddys except one afternoon excursion to the Salton Sea.

The piles of dead tialpia and bird skeletons were there right where I left them last year.

This tilapia tried to teach us the dangers of alcohol abuse.

Only one out of three of us could smell the dead fishy smell.

Two out of three of us took selfies with dead tilaipa.

Zero out of three of us did any fishing.

Merry Christmas from Bombay Beach California.

See you next year. Same time and place. Less flu virus and more beer.