Frog Hat (Take It Easy)

I have arrived in Los Angeles and started drinking the cheap America beers before my hotel room was even ready to drop my luggage in. 

We Can Hamster Party All Night (And Drink Some Cherry Wine)

4:30am is far too early to wake up and get to the airport. I'm just saying........

O To The M To The G

Mr. Bunndini is deeply excited to go to Houston next week! Dr. Stapler gird your liver! Meme chose! Fajitas!

The Weather Outside Is Frightful But These Sloths Are So Delightful

I woke up this morning to snow falling and a frigid minus seven degrees. As I walked to work with a gigantic puffy coat on listening to The Moth podcasts I was thankful for gloves with tiny magical pads on the index fingers so I can use my iphone without getting frostbite. Now I'm cold and I want to go home and lie under many blankets.

It Ain't Easy Sloths It Ain't Easy

I slept in this morning. It's very cold outside and hard to do much besides lying in bed drinking coffee and reading the news on the tiny screen of my phone.

My Mama Told Me You Better Sloth Around

If you add a plate of meatloaf sandwiches, a fluffy pink blanket, slippers and constant stream of pay per view movies this is basically me all weekend. I did go bowling last night (which is the most exercise I have had this whole year) but any healthful benefits were negated by the three beers I drank while performing said activity. 

If Eating Meatloaf Sandwiches For Breakfast Is Wrong Then I Don't Want To Be Right

Danger High Voltage

Dear Mr. Firepie: 

Please do not attempt this moustache at home. I'm sorry your computer hard drive crashed but that is no excuse not to trim your facial hair.

Regards,

Mr. Bunndini

Nerd Porn (Now With Added Kittens)

Give A Hoot, Don't Pollute

Mr. Bunndini is not always a good sleeper. Generally this is not a problem as insomnia frees up time to pursue some very rewarding hobbies between the hours of 4 and 6am like New York Times crossword puzzles and email chatting with friends in other time zones. I have also perfected the art of making and drinking coffee in almost total darkness. Unfortunately the rest of the world around me is not always on board with the early morning hours I like to keep. Most stores are not open and the ones that are offer unrewarding shopping experiences (The 7-11 on the corner does not even have soy milk - schmon people). This morning at 5am I wanted nothing more than to vacuum. I vacuum my hard wood frequently with my Dyson vacuum (which cost more than 5/6th of the cars I've ever owned). We have a special relationship. A love that dare not speak its name if you will.

My downstairs neighbours are nice people. They have a big dog and a little baby, both of which I hear making random noises on occasion but never to the point of being aggressively annoying. I just think of how much more annoying it would be if the aforementioned dog and baby lived in my apartment and belonged to me and it generally makes the noise fade right into the background.

But many sleepless mornings I wonder how early is too early to vacuum? If I can hear their baby crying is it still too early? Does it have to be light out? Can Mr. Dyson invent a completely quiet vacuum for early risers?

Also, if I was marooned on a desert island and could only take three luxury (non-food and shelter related) items I would take chapstick, my iPhone and a Dyson Vacuum.

Thank you for your support.

Portage On Over Here And Voulez-Vous Couchez Avec Moi

JACQUES FRONTENAC: A large piece of woolen or similar material used as a bed covering or other covering for warmth which possesses a distinctive pattern and personality. Speaks in a french accent and is often territorial of other blankets and/or significant others.

Girding My Loins

After a blissfully uneventful two weeks away from the office I have to strap on my happy pants and go back to sitting at a chair in front of a desk and talking on the big girl phone. Three cups of coffee, one bagel with melted cheese and multiple internal pep talks have not made this task any easier or more enjoyable.